Scene the First

Mr. Reeve's House. Enter Mrs. Reeves & the Milliner at different doors.

MRS. R.

So, you have brought the dresses, have you?

MIL.

I have brought the young Lady's dress, & Mistress says you may depend upon having yours this Evening.

MRS. R.

Well, tell her to be sure & bring it. But let us see the dress that is come.

She takes the Bandbox out of the Milliner's hands.

MIL.

Have you other commands Madam?

MRS. R.

No, you may go. Miss Byron & I will come to morrow & pay you.

Exit Milliner.

MRS. R.

Come, I will see whether she has made it right. Oh! but here is Miss Byron coming. I think it is but fair to let her see it first.

Enter Miss Byron with a work bag in her harm.

MRS. R.

Here my dear, here is your dress come. I hope it will fit, for if it does not she will hardly have time to alter it.

MISS B.

We will take it up stairs if you please & look at it, for Mr. Reeves is coming, & we shall have some of his Raillery.

Exeunt in an hurry.

Enter Mr. Reeves.

MR. R.

So, for once in a way I have got the coast clear of Dresses & Band boxes; & I hope my wife & Miss Byron will continue to keep their Milliner in their own rooms, or any where so as they are not in my way. Why, if I had not had a little spirit the other day I should have had them in my own study. -

Enter Sally.

SALLY.

Do you know where Miss Byron is Sir? -

MR. R.

She is up in her own room I beleive. -

Sally curtseys & goes off. -

MR. R.

Sally, Sally. -

Re-enter Sally.

SALLY.

Sir -

MR. R.

Tell Thomas to bring out the Bay horse.

SALLY.

Yes Sir.

Exit Sally.

MR. R.

Well, I must go & get on my boots - & by that time the horse will be out. -

Scene 2d

Mr. Reeves' house.

Mr. Reeves entering in a great hurry at one door, & running out at the other, calls behind the Scenes. -

MR. R.

John, run all over London & see if you can find the Chairman or Chair that took Miss Byron. You know what number it was. - Thomas, run for Dr. Smith directly.

He comes in again in great agitation.

Enter Bridget.

BRID.

Mistress is rather better Sir, & begs you will send for Dr. Smith.

MR. R.

I have, I have.

Exit Bridget, exit Mr. Reeves at different doors. - calls behind the Scenes -

MR. R.

William, run to Mr. Greville's Lodgings & if he is at home - Stop William, Come in here: -

(He comes in again, takes out his writing box & writes a note in great haste.)

MR. R.

Here William is a note. Carry it to Mr. Greville's -

Exit William.

Enter Thomas

THOS.

Dr. Smith, Sir.

MR. R.

Shew him up stairs to your Mistress.

Enter John.

JOHN.

I cannot find either the Chair or the Chairman Sir and Wilson is not come within Sir.

MR. R.

Well, she must be carried out into the country I think. - You go to Paddington & tell Thomas to go to Hampstead, & see if you can find her, & I will go to Clapham.

Exit Mr. Reeves.

Scene 1st

Paddington -. The curtain draws up & discovers Miss Byron, Mrs. Awberry.

MRS. A.

But my dear young Lady, think what a large fortune Sir Hargrave has got, & he intends you nothing but marriage -

MISS. B.

Oh! Mrs. Awberry, do you think I can marry a man whom I always disliked & now I hate? Is this not your House? Cannot you favour my Escape? -

MRS. A.

My dear Madam that is impossible without detection. You know Sir Hargrave is here & there & everywhere.

MISS B.

My dear Mrs. Awberry you shall have all the money in this purse if you will release me. -

Sir Hargrave burst into the room.

SIR H.

Mrs. Awberry I see you are not to be trusted with her, you are so tender-hearted. And you Madam! -

He snatches the purse out of her hand & flings it on the ground. He goes to the door & calls

SIR H.

Mr - We are ready. -

Enter a Clergyman & his Clerk.

SIR H.

Miss Awberry you will be the Bridemaid if you please. -

He takes hold of Miss Byron's hand.

SIR H.

Now Madam, all your purses will not save you. -

The Clergyman takes a book out of his pocket. Miss Byron screams & faints away. Miss Sally Awberry runs in.

MISS A.

Sally, Sally, bring a glass of water directly.

Mrs. Awberry takes out her Salts & applies them to Miss Byron's nose.

SIR H.

I wish Women were not quite so delicate, with all their faints and fits! -

Miss Byron revives. Miss Sally returns with a glass of water & offers it to Miss Byron who drinks some.

MRS A.

What a long time you have been Child! If she faints again I shall send your Sister. -

SALLY. (aside)

I am glad of it. -

SIR H.

Come Sir, we will try again. -

Takes hold of Miss Byron's hand, Miss Awberry goes behind her.

CLERGN: reads.

Dearly beloved -

She dashes the book out of his hand. -

CLERGN: picking it up again -

Oh! my poor book!

SIR H.

Begin again Sir, if you please. You shall be well paid for your trouble.

CLERGN: reading again.

Dearly Beloved -

Miss Byron snatches the book out of his hand & flings it into the fire, exclaiming

MISS B.

Burn, quick, quick. -

The clergn runs to the fire & cries out

CLERGN:

Oh! Sir Hargrave you must buy me another. -

SIR H.

I will Sir, & twenty more if you will do the business. - Is the book burnt? -

MRS. A.

Yes, Sir - & we cannot lend you one in its place, for we have lost the key of the closet where we keep our Prayerbooks.

SIR H.

Well Sir, I beleive we must put it off for the present. And if we are not married in this house we shall be in mine in the Forest.

CLERGN:

Then I may go Sir I suppose. Remember the Prayer book. -

SIR H.

Yes Sir.

Exit Clergyman & his Clerk.

SIR H.

I shall be very much obliged to you Mrs. A. if you & the young Ladies will go out of the room for an instant. I will see if I cannot reason with this perverse girl. -

MRS. A.

Here Deb & Sal, come out.

Exeunt Mrs e Miss A's.

MISS B.

Oh! do not leave me alone with him, let me go out too.

She runs to the door. Sir H. follows her. She gets half way through the door, & he in shutting it squeezes her. She screams & faints. He carries her away in his arms to a Chair, & rings the bell violently.

Enter Mrs. A. & her daughters

SIR H.

Bring some water directly.

Both the daughters go out. Miss Byron revives, & exclaims

MISS B.

So, I hope you have killed me at last.

Re-enter Miss Awberry with the water. Sir Hargrave takes the glass & gives it to Miss B.

MISS B.

No I thank you. I do not want anything that can give me life.

SIR H.

Well Miss Awberry you had better get out the Cloak. It is four o'clock & she may as well die in my house as in yours.

MRS. A.

Shall I order the Chariot Sir? -

SIR H.

If you please Ma'am.

Miss A. takes a long Cloak out of a Closet and attempts to put it round Miss B. - Miss B. struggles.

SIR H.

I will put on Miss Awberry if she will not let you.

He puts it on.

SIR H.

Will you help me lead her down stairs Miss Awberry?

MISS A.

Yes Sir.

They both take hold of Miss B. - Enter Sally Awberry.

SALLY.

Can I be of any service Sir? -

SIR H.

You may hold the Candle.

Sally takes the Candle. Exeunt. -

Scene 1.

Colnebrook -

Enter Miss Grandison & Miss Byron.

MISS B.

And where is this brother of yours to whom I am so much andebted.

MISS G.

Safe in St. James Square I hope. - But why my dear will you continue to think yourself so much endebted to him, when he only did his duty?

MISS B.

But what must he have thought of me in such a dress? - Oh! these odious Masquerades!

MISS G.

La! my dear, what does it signify what he thinks? He will understand it all in time. Come if your stomach pains you, you had better go to bed again.

MISS B.

No, it does not pain me at all. But how kind it was in my cousin Reeves to come and see me.

MISS G.

Yes he is a very nice Man. I like him very much. He disputes charmingly, - I thought he would have got the better of me. - Well but my dear Harriet, you have had a letter today. How does my Grandmama Shirley do, & my Uncle & Aunt Selby and my Cousins Lucy & Nancy?

MISS B.

They are all very well I thank you, & my Grandmama thinks herself under the greatest obligation to Sir Charles for being both her & his Harriet's Deliverer, for it he had not rescued me, she would have died of a broken hearth. -

MISS G.

Well really I am very glad he saved you for both your sakes. My brother is a charming Man. I always catch him doing some good action. We all wish him to be married but he has no time for Love. - At least he appears to have none. For he is constantly going about from one place to another. But what for, we cannot tell. And we have such a high respect for him that we never interfere in his affairs. - I will return in a minute. I am going to fetch my work bag.

Exit Miss G. -

MISS B.

What an odd Brother is this! If he is so fond of them, why should he wish them not to know his affairs? -

Re-enter Miss G.

MISS G.

What is the matter Harriet? What makes you so dull Child? - I shall take care not to leave you by yourself again in an hurry, if on my return I am to find these gloomy fits have taken hold of you. Come, I will play you your favourite tune Laure & Lenze.

MISS B.

I was thinking of Sir Hargrave Pollexfen. But be so good as to play my tune.

MISS G.

I will directly.

She goes to the Harpsichord & plays - After she has done playing she comes to Miss B. & says

MISS G.

Come, it is time for you to go to bed. It is 4 o'clock & you have been up ever since 12.

Exeunt.

Scene 2.

Curtain draws up & discovers Miss G. reading in the Library.

MISS G.

Well I think this book would suit Harriet. But here is Sir Charles come home I beleive. I will go & see. Oh! here he is. -

Enter Sir Charles. She goes to him. He takes hold of her hand.

SIR C.

No more colds I hope my dear Charlotte - but above all, how does our lovely Charge do?

MISS G.

Oh! Much better. She got up at 12, & I have but just sent her to bed.

SIR C.

When do you expect Lord & Lady L.? -

MISS G.

This Evening, about six or seven o'clock.

SIR C.

Indeed! I am very glad of it.

Enter Jenny.

JEN.

Miss Byron would be glad to speak with you Ma'am.

MISS G.

Very well, I will come to her.

SIR C.

How is your Cold Jenny?

JEN.

Quite well I thank you Sir.

Curtsies & exit.

MISS G.

You will excuse me for a minute Sir Charles. I must obey my summons.

Exit.

SIR C.

Certainly. Well I must go & speak to Frederic.

Exit. -

Scene 3.

Curtain draws up & discovers Lord & Lady L. & Sir Charles & Miss G. at Tea. -

SIR C.

So my Lord, you have heard of our new Sister?

LORD L.

Yes Sir Charles, and Miss G. by her description of her, has made me long to see her. -

MISS G.

Frederic. - Take this to Sir Charles. - (holding some Tea.)

SIR C.

I hope you will not be disappointed when you see her. - I might say We, for I have hardly seen her yet.

MISS G.

I hope you do not think of me a flatterer Sir Charles.

SIR C.

Certainly not my dear Charlotte.

LADY L.

I assure you Charlotte can flatter sometimes.

MISS G.

Oh! For shame Caroline. I thought you knew better then to tell tales. Lord L. will you have any more tea?

LORD L.

No I thank you Charlotte.

LADY L.

But Charlotte how do we come by our new Sister? I have not heard that yet.

MISS G.

Well, we will go & take a walk in the Garden & talk about it. Frederic you may take away. Come Caroline make haste, or the fit will be off. - Gentlemen, will you accompany us? -

SIR C.

Lord L. will you?

LORD L:

Certainly.

SIR C:

Yes, we will go Charlotte. -

MISS G.

Come, make haste the fit is almost off.

Exeunt.

Scene 1.

Colnebrook. Curtain draws up & discovers Sir C. & Miss G., Lord L. & Miss B. -

MISS G.

What an impudent fellow Lord G., is to make you wait so Sir Charles. - Oh! he is a poor creature.

SIR C.

Have patience my dear Charlotte. Something most likely has detained him.

MISS G.

Indeed Sir Charles, you are too forgiving. If he were to serve to me so, he would not get into favour for some time. - What say you Harriot? -

MISS B.

Indeed Miss G. you are too severe. - Besides, as Sir Charles says, something may detain him; & it is a different thing making a Lady wait on a Gentleman. But here ought to be an end of your severity, for the object of it I beleive is come. I hear him in the Hall.

Enter Lord G.

LORD G.

I am afraid I have been making you wait Gentlemen.

MISS G.

Well, you need not be afraid any longer, for you certainly have.

SIR C.

Fye Charlotte! - I do not think that was civillest thing in the world to say.

LORD G.

I hope I have not offended you Madam.

MISS G.

Yes you have, for making my dear brother wait.

SIR C.

I will not be bribed into liking your wit Charlotte. - But where is Caroline all this while? -

MISS G.

She is gone out in her Chariot with Emily - but I wonder Sir Charles you did not enquire after your favourite Sister before.

LORD L.

I am sure Miss G. you cannot reproach your brother with partiality. Bur Sir Charles is it not time for us to go out riding? - If it is not, I am sure Miss G. might have spared her severity on Lord G.

SIR C.

I assure you Lord L. that I had not forgot it, but I think it is too late to go out now. It is 3 o'clock. Now Charlotte hold your tongue. I am sure some raillery is coming out.

He rings the bell.

MISS G.

I will not hold my tongue Sir Charles.

SIR C.

Then Charlotte if you speak, do not let us have any severity.

MISS G.

Very well, I will be good. Harriot, what is the matter, Child? You look languid. I will ring the bell for some Broth for you.

SIR C.

Spare yourself that trouble my dear Charlotte, I have just rung it.

Enter Frederic

SIR C.

Bring some sandwiches & a bason of broth Frederic.

Exit Frederic.

MISS G.

Harriot, should you like your broth up in your own room better? -

MISS B.

If you please.

MISS G.

Well, we will take it up with us.

Enter Frederic with the Sandwiches & the Broth. He sets it down upon the Table. Exit Fred. - Miss G. takes the broth.

MISS G.

Come Harriot. -

Exit Miss B. & Miss G.

Sir C. hands the Sandwiches.

SIR C.

How long Caroline has been gone! I hope no more Sir Hargrave Pollexfens have run away with her & Emily. -

Enter Lady L. Miss G. & Miss J. Lord L. goes to meet her, takes her hand & leads her to a Sopha.

MISS G.

Lord! What a Loving Couple they are.

SIR C.

Charlotte, hold your tongue.

LORD L.

And where have you been to my dear Caroline?

LADY L.

Only shopping. But Charlotte where is Miss B.?

MISS G.

Very safe in her own room. I always send her away when she gapes.

LADY L.

Poor Creature! I hope she does not gape too often. But seriously Charlotte, is she worse or better? -

MISS G.

Law! Lady L. you are so afraid I shall not take care of her. - Why, she is just as she is always is - languid at 3 o'clock. I beleive it is because Lord G. always comes about at that time; & she is so sorry to see her poor Charlotte plagued so! -

MISS JERVOIS.

Dear Miss G. who plagues you? I am sure Lord G. does not.

MISS G.

Emily you do not know anything of the matter. You must hold your tongue till it is your turn to be called upon. -

MISS J.

Well Miss G. I think it is you who teaze him, but he will certainly get the better of you at last. He did once you know. And I do not know what you mean by its being my turn to be called upon.

MISS G.

Why, when it is your turn to be married. But you had better not get on Lord G.'s side; you will be worsted certainly. But come is not it time to dress? (looks at her watch) Dear me! It is but four.

LORD L.

You need not say "But" Charlotte, for you know we are to dine at 1/2 after 4, to day.

MISS G.

Indeed my Lord, my Lady did not tell me so. Well, I will pardon her this time. Come then Let us go, if it is time.

Exeunt Ladies.

LORD L.

What an odd girl is Charlotte. But you must not despair Lord G. I beleive she likes you tho' she wont own it. I hope Miss Byron when she is recovered will have a little influence over her.

SIR C.

Indeed I hope so too. Miss Byron is a charming young woman. I think from what I have seen of her, her mind is a complete as her person. She is the happy medium between Gravity & over liveliness. She is lively or grave as the occasion requires.

LORD G.

Indeed she is a delightful young woman, & only Miss G. can equal her. I do not mean any offence to Lady L.

LORD L.

Indeed my Lord I do not take it as such. Caroline is grave, Charlotte is lively, I am fond of gravity, you most likely are fond of Loveliness.

Enter a Footman

FOOTMAN.

Dinner is on Table my Lord. -

LORD L.

Very well.

Exit Footman

Enter Lady L. Miss G. Miss B & Miss J.

LORD L.

Dinner is upon Table my dear Caroline.

LADY L.

Indeed. Come Harriet & all of you. -

Exeunt.

Scene 1

Library at Colnebrook. Sir Charles & Mr. Selby.

MR. S.

But my dear Sir Charles my neice is but 18. I never will allow her to marry till she is 22. I shall take her back into Northamptonshire if you have done nothing but put such notions into the girl's head. I had no notion of my Harriet's coming to this. And besides Sir C. I never will allow her to marry you till Lady Clementina della Porretta is married. -

SIR C.

Mr. Selby that has been my objection for some time to making my proposal to Miss B. But yesterday I received some Letters from Italy in which they have great hopes of Lady Clementina's being soon persuaded to marry. She wishes me in the same letter to set her the example by marrying an English woman. I admire Miss Byron very much, but I will never marry her against your consent. And if you had not told me she was 18, I should have thought her quite as much as 22. I do not mean by her looks but by her prudence.

MR. S.

Upon my word you are a fine fellow, you have done away all my objections, & if you can get Harriot's consent you have mine. I hope she will not be nice, for if she do not get a husband now, she never may for she has refused all the young Gentry of our Neighbourhood. And as to her fortune I will tell you plainly she has no more than 14,000£.

SIR C.

As the her fortune it is no object to me. Miss Byron herself is a Jewel of inestimable value. Her understanding more than makes up for want of fortune. And now if we can bring Lord G. & my Sister Charlotte together we shall have a double wedding. But I am afraid Charlotte is too lively for matrimony.

MR. S.

Oh! Yes, your sister is a fine girl, only she is too nice about an husband. Adsheart! I hope you wo'nt have such a plague with my Harriot, as I had with my Dame Selby. Well, but it is three o'clock. I will go & break it to her. Sir Charles, you may come & stay at the door till you are admitted, you know.

Exeunt. -

Scene 2.

Drawing room. Lady L. Miss G. Miss B. & Miss J.

MISS G.

There is something monstrous frightful to be sure my dear Harriot in marrying a man that one likes.

LADY L.

My dear Charlotte, you overpower Harriot with your Raillery. - I dare say you will feel the same fright when you marry Lord G. -

MISS G.

I will tell you Lady L. - To tell you a secret I am not likely to marry Lord G. - for I want to be married at home, & my brother will not consent to it.

MISS J.

Oh! fye! Miss Grandison, I wonder how you could think of it.

MISS B.

Indeed Charlotte, I am of Emily's opinion. Are not you Lady L.?

LADY L.

Certainly. And I know my brother will let as few people be by at the Ceremony as possible.

MISS G.

I see you are all joined in concert against me; but before I give up, I will take the liberty to chuse how many people I like to be by. -

LADY L.

I am sure Harriot will not object to that. Shall you Harriot? -

MISS B.

Oh! not at all. Indeed I wish myself to have but few people by. Lord Bless me! I do beleive here are my Aunt & Cousins come.

MISS G.

I suppose Mrs. Reeves has brought her Marmouset with her.

Enter Mr. & Mrs. Reeves, Mrs. Selby, Lucy & Nancy. -

MISS BYRON rising & meeting Mrs. Selby.

Oh! how do you do, my dear Aunt? - How does my Grandmama do ? -

MRS. S.

She is pretty well my Love, & she would have come, but she thought the Journey too long for her to undertake.

MISS B.

Lucy e Nancy are you quite rid of your colds? And Mrs. Reeves! - I did not expect this favour. - Let me introduce you all to my friends. -

She introduces them.

MISS G.

Mrs. Reeves, have you not brought your Baby? -

MRS. R.

No she would not take that liberty. I wanted her to do it, because I knew you would excuse it. Miss Byron, where are the Bridegrooms? -

LADY L.

I will go & call them, & my Lord. -

Exit Lady L.

MISS B.

Lucy, were the roads very good? -

LUCY.

Indeed they were very good.

MR. R.

Yes, our ponies went on fast enough.

MISS G.

Did you ride Sir?

MR. R.

No Ma'am, we came in our phaeton, & the Selbys in their Coach. -

Enter Lady L. - with the 4 Gentlemen. She introduces them.

MR. S.

Mrs. Selby, here is the Bridegroom of your Harriot. Adsheart! we shall have a double marriage, as sure as two - & two - make four. And here is the other Bridegroom.

(pointing to Lord G.)

MISS G.

Yes, this is my Man sure enough. I wish, I had a better one to shew you. But he is better than he was.

SIR C.

Fye! Charlotte, I am sure you have nothing to complain of in Lord G. And if you will make a good wife, I will answer for it he will a Husband. - And I hope you will be as happy, as I promise myself Miss Byron & I shall be. - And I hope she will have no reason to lament having chosen me for Husband. -

The Curtain Falls.