I lowered my eyelids, firmly resolved not to open them again, that
I might not be influenced by external objects, for distraction had gradually taken possession of me until I hardly knew what I was doing.
In another minute, nevertheless, I reopened my eyes, for through my eyelashes I still beheld her all sparkling with prismatic colors, and surrounded with such a penumbra as one beholds in gazing at the sun.
Oh, how beautiful she was!
The
greatest painters, who followed
ideal beauty into heaven itself, and
thence brought back to earth the true
portrait of the Madonna, never in
their delineations even approached
that wildly beautiful reality which I
saw before me. Neither the verses of
the poet nor the palette of the artist
could convey any conception of her.
She was rather tall, with a form and
bearing of a goddess. Her hair, of a
soft blond hue, was parted in the
midst and flowed back over her
temples in two rivers of rippling
gold; she seemed a diademed queen.
Her forehead, bluish-white in its
transparency, extended its calm
breadth above the arches of her eyebrows, which by a strange singularity
were almost black, and admirably relieved the effect of sea-green eyes of
unsustainable vivacity and brilliancy.
What eyes! With a single flash they
could have decided a man’s destiny.
They had a life, a limpidity, an
ardor, a humid light which I have
never seen in human eyes; they shot
forth rays like arrows, which I could
distinctly see enter my heart. I
know not if the fire which illumined
them came from heaven or from hell,
but assuredly it came from one or
the other. That woman was either an
angel or demon, perhaps both. Assuredly she never sprang from the
flank of Eve, our common mother.
Teeth of the most lustrous pearl
gleamed in her ruddy smile, and at
every inflection of her lips little
dimples appeared in the satiny rose
of her adorable cheeks. There was a
delicacy and pride in the regal out¬
line of her nostrils bespeaking noble
blood. Agate gleams played over the
smooth, lustrous skin of her half-bare
shoulders, and strings of great blond
pearls — almost equal to her neck in
beauty of color — descended upon her
bosom. Prom time to time she elevated her head with the undulating
grace of a startled serpent or peacock,
thereby imparting a quivering motion
to the high lace ruff which surrounded it like a silver trelliswork.
She wore a robe of orange-red velvet, and from her wide ermine-lined sleeves there peeped forth patrician hands of infinite delicacy, and so ideally transparent that, like the fingers of Aurora, they permitted the light to shine through them.
All these details I can recollect at this moment as plainly as though they were of yesterday, for notwithstanding I was greatly troubled at the time, nothing escaped me; the faintest touch of shading, the little dark speck at the point of the chin, the imperceptible down at the comers of the lips, the velvety floss upon the brow, the quivering shadows of the eyelashes upon the cheeks — I could notice everything with astonishing lucidity of perception.
And gazing I felt opening within me gates that had until then remained closed; vents long obstructed became all clear, permitting glimpses of unfamiliar perspectives within; life suddenly made itself visible to me under a totally novel aspect. I felt as though I had just been born into a new world and a new order of things. A frightful anguish commenced to torture my heart as with red-hot pincers. Every successive minute seemed to me at once but a second and yet a century. Meanwhile the ceremony was proceeding, and I shortly found myself transported far from that world of which my newly born desires were furiously